Where everybody knows your name... and Moe pretends not to.
Famous for our signature cocktails, prank call resilience, and the occasional alien sighting in the back room. Live entertainment every weekβassuming the health inspector doesn't visit.
"I'm a well-wisher, in that I don't wish you any specific harm." - Moe Szyslak
π₯ What We Offer
- πΊ Duff Beer - On tap, in bottles, in our hearts
- π₯ Flaming Moes - Secret ingredient definitely NOT cough syrup
- π The Love Tester - Currently stuck on "Cold Fish"
- π΅ Live Entertainment - Every week (quality varies)
β οΈ Warning: Do not ask for Amanda Hugginkiss, Ivana Tinkle, or Jacques Strap.
"We put the 'dive' in 'dive bar,' and we're proud of it."
Where everybody knows your name... and Moe pretends not to.
Famous for our signature cocktails, prank call resilience, and the occasional alien sighting in the back room. Live entertainment every weekβassuming the health inspector doesn't visit.
"I'm a well-wisher, in that I don't wish you any specific harm." - Moe Szyslak
π₯ What We Offer
- πΊ Duff Beer - On tap, in bottles, in our hearts
- π₯ Flaming Moes - Secret ingredient definitely NOT cough syrup
- π The Love Tester - Currently stuck on "Cold Fish"
- π΅ Live Entertainment - Every week (quality varies)
β οΈ Warning: Do not ask for Amanda Hugginkiss, Ivana Tinkle, or Jacques Strap.
"We put the 'dive' in 'dive bar,' and we're proud of it."
About
π Words That Move You... To Tears π’
Competitive spoken word poetry featuring Springfield's most melancholic verses. Hosted by the Sultan of Sadness himself, Moe Szyslak.
"I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt. Not that fancy store-bought dirt. That stuff's loaded with nutrients." - Moe Szyslak
π Sample Verse (by Moe)
"My life is empty
No one calls, the bar is dead
Pass the rat poison"
π Categories
- π Most Depressing - The Moe Special
- π Most Tears Generated - Audience vote
- π Best Performance - Drama counts
Tissues provided. Bring your sad poems and your sadder life experiences. π