Lurleen Lumpkin
Your wife don't understand you,...

Your wife don't understand you, but I do.

Springfield's sweetheart of country music, discovered at the Beer-N-Brawl by her former manager Homer Simpson. From humble waitress origins to chart-topping success, Lurleen brings heartfelt honky-tonk to venues across the state.

"I've been down so long, it looks like up to me." - Lurleen Lumpkin


Hit Songs

  • "Your Wife Don't Understand You"
  • "I'm Basting a Turkey With My Tears"
  • "Don't Look Up My Dress Unless You Mean It"
  • "Bagged Me a Homer"

Stand by your ma-aa-aan...

Moe's Tavern
Moe's Tavern
Moe's Tavern

Where everybody knows your name... and Moe pretends not to.

Famous for our signature cocktails, prank call resilience, and the occasional alien sighting in the back room. Live entertainment every weekβ€”assuming the health inspector doesn't visit.

"I'm a well-wisher, in that I don't wish you any specific harm." - Moe Szyslak


πŸ₯ƒ What We Offer

  • 🍺 Duff Beer - On tap, in bottles, in our hearts
  • πŸ”₯ Flaming Moes - Secret ingredient definitely NOT cough syrup
  • πŸ’” The Love Tester - Currently stuck on "Cold Fish"
  • 🎡 Live Entertainment - Every week (quality varies)

⚠️ Warning: Do not ask for Amanda Hugginkiss, Ivana Tinkle, or Jacques Strap.

"We put the 'dive' in 'dive bar,' and we're proud of it."

Where everybody knows your name... and Moe pretends not to.

Famous for our signature cocktails, prank call resilience, and the occasional alien sighting in the back room. Live entertainment every weekβ€”assuming the health inspector doesn't visit.

"I'm a well-wisher, in that I don't wish you any specific harm." - Moe Szyslak


πŸ₯ƒ What We Offer

  • 🍺 Duff Beer - On tap, in bottles, in our hearts
  • πŸ”₯ Flaming Moes - Secret ingredient definitely NOT cough syrup
  • πŸ’” The Love Tester - Currently stuck on "Cold Fish"
  • 🎡 Live Entertainment - Every week (quality varies)

⚠️ Warning: Do not ask for Amanda Hugginkiss, Ivana Tinkle, or Jacques Strap.

"We put the 'dive' in 'dive bar,' and we're proud of it."

Filter Events

Free entry
Online

🚝 Monorail Karaoke Night

Jan 5
🚝 Monorail Karaoke Night - Flyer

About

MONORAIL! MONORAIL! MONORAIL! 🚝

I've sold monorails to Brockway, Ogdenville, and North Haverbrook, and by gum, it put them on the map! πŸ—ΊοΈ

"Is there a chance the track could bend?" "Not on your life, my Hindu friend!"

🎡 Tonight's Setlist

  • 🚝 "Monorail" (mandatory opener - crowd participation required)
  • 🌸 "We Put the Spring in Springfield"
  • πŸ§₯ "See My Vest" (fur-free version)
  • πŸͺ "Who Needs the Kwik-E-Mart"

Karaoke Rules: πŸ“‹

  1. 🎭 Lyle Lanley impressions get bonus points
  2. πŸ‘« Singing with a partner encouraged
  3. πŸ™‰ If Marge objects, we ignore it

What about us brain-dead slobs? You'll be given cushy jobs! πŸ’Ό